Not to think of a white bear - The How And Why of
Contemporary Selfdelusion

While in residency at the CCA, Glasgow, January 2009,  I started my research on the piece : The How And Why Of Contemporary Selfdelusion;  an edifying powerpointshow,  about how to deceive oneself. I is about the self - integrity and the great human ability to change ones mind!  This possibility will be talked about with examples such as placebo medicine, money saving techniques (of using cash instead of credit cards) and techniques for getting up in time (setting the alarm clock earlier than it actually is).  I dived into theories of desire, suppression, tact, manners and how to do it's, to put forward some ideas about positive effects of weakness in character, inconsistenties and unstable minds.

In this research I stumbled upon the  furry and frighteningly white aspect of the white bear - and ended up making it all about  trying to do what Dostoyevskij couldn't, when he in 1863 described his uncontrollable mind with this small exercise: "Try and pose yourself the task, not to think of a white bear - and the cursed thing comes to mind every minute." Fyodor Dostyevskij, Winter Notes on Summer Impressions, 1863.

Thus, around May 2009, in a lecture about selfdeceit,  the bear came out of my head, and September we had a great trip to China together, but as with all partnerships, it is not always just jolly,  and right now I am not sure whether the bear may just be more of a hazzle out than in.

The bear now has it's own website where it can tell it's own side of the story: www.thewhitebear.info


Below are some images and text from the lecture by myself and the bear that came out of it. Some of the text is still in danish, but the english translation is in progress!

- photos by Barbara Katzin
..Perhaps, it can one day be possible, to steer clear of unwanted thoughts, that pop up at inappropriate moments, among gentlemen and -women who heroically try  do their best to be be better more just and  more fair persons, who shines with and  virtue and spirit.





"...But alas! One cannot be everywhere, and the cleanliness in ones own home can, agasint honorale intentions, make the mess in the rest of the world much more obvious. It may have been the sight of this cursed largescale-mess, and the feeling of having a hopeless and impossibeltask ahead of them, that, in the end got the better of these (the housewives) practioneres of cleanly and optimistic ideals, so that they ended up stashing away bottles and pills in drawers and closets to make them overcome the dissapointements of not fulfilling their high hopes.
Drug-addiction and drinking problems are wellknown habits of the housewives of the fifties, and when housewives sought the doctors aid against the stress and sadness that would have to fill such unfulfilled dreamers, they were for instance prescribed the new miracle-medicine: Amphetamine – that in the paperwork, was prescribed against something completely different. All these bottles in the back of the closets, and the stranbeg deceitful paperwork to get prescripted drugs, may possibly be, what incited future generations in passing judgement and having new dreams, that were possibly just as impossible, of authenticity, sincerity, and truth in the closets and behind the facades.

The sons and daughters of the fantast housewives set in motion a desillusioned movement agains all kinds of tidy selfdeceit tht in their eyes would always only be suppressed mess. Even though their truthseeking aspirations and experimnts are in fact honorable, they may have been the precursors for todays unjust judgment on amphetamine an closed closets.

I am willing to undertake yet another attempt with some of these elements, as I think it is obvious that too many messy and incoherent ideas have since then seen the light of day.



"...i årevis har jeg alligevel narret mig selv. Narret mig selv tid, tid der snegler sig afsted, når jeg keder mig og går alt for hurtigt når jeg har det sjovt, og som jeg om morgenen altid kan bruge ti minutter mere af. I årevis har jeg stilllet mit vækkeur 10 minutter foran virkeligheden. Dvs. at når klokken er 7 på mit ur, så er den i virkeligheden kun 10 minutter i 7. På den måde kommer jeg op til tiden, og selvom jeg udmærket ved hvad klokken er slået, så virker det upåklageligt..."


"... en anden ting er dog: hvornår er det egentlig passende at stå op, og er der egentlig et tidspunkt som er det bedste at starte dagen på. I de seneste år, er der sket et skred i den almindelige opfattelse af hvad tid dagen begynder. Flere har plæderet for, at give skole-elever friere valg om hvornår de skal møde, for frihedens og de veludhvilede skolelevers skyld. Min erfaring med træthed siger mig dog, at det naturligvis er trætheden der er konstant, og friheden der er relativ, og at jeg efter en rum tid ville have tilpasset mig denne nye frihed..til at sove længe, så klokken otte blot ville blive et nye tidspunkt som jeg skulle stille mit vækkeur 10 minutter før..."

"....For senere på dagen, så er der penge at spare ved at narre sig selv med kontanter i et slags selvbedrag classic, hvor man udskifter kreditkortet med kontanter, hvilket jo ikke gør pengene hverken mere eller mindre værd, men som alligevel, viser erfaring, bevirker at man bruger færre penge. Personligt har jeg det egentligt lige omvendt og undgår gerne kontanter..men sådan er vi jo så forskellige..."



"...And as we now, with Edmund Burke, acknowledge this strange interest of ours in dread and misfortune, and how this interest makes us transgress the reaction to run away from it, that all logic would prescribe us to, then it may just be a good idea , in the name of selfdeciet and looking past oneself, to look for greatness in the the oscillating element of horror. That is why, a painter, if he wanted to make a sublime piece of art, that could change something in the viewer, would have to use shady colors such as brown, darkpurple, or maybe even all blakc, because that was the palette of dismal.."





"...But people are scared by such different encounters,and there is off course a world of difference between what turns the world upside down in 1757, 2009 or 1851. And It is funny that i should mention 1851. In that year Herman Melville cheekily replied to Edmund Burks choice of hue with a whole new chapter in the canon of what frightens us, The capter:The whiteness of the whale, from Moby Dick, that elagntly changed the clour of the frock of dismal, and made white the new black as well as making old times seem foolish and modern day so wonderfully complicated

(from Moby Dick)“Witness the white bear of the poles, and the white shark of the tropics; what but their smooth, flaky whiteness makes them the transcendent horrors they are? That ghastly whiteness it is which imparts such an abhorrent mildness, even more loathsome than terrific, to the dumb gloating of their aspect. So that not the fierce-fanged tiger in his heraldic coat can so stagger courage as the white-shrouded bear or shark.*

“...and white really is a complicated idea, a colour and not a colour, neutral and full of meaning, and white attracts dirt like nothing else – but- if one is able to keep it spotless , it may suddenly not be possible to see the white bear, and with the steady hand of the housewife it may be possible to get the colours to blend into the precise nuance of oscillating doubt , in you and me and how and what, that will make yesterdays colours look as naive and all too easily understood as Burkes palette of the sublime looked from the viewpoint of 1851!...”
Developed with support from:

History of this piece: Placebo - window-piece for the medical museion of Copenhagen

Placebo - (backside info of pillglass) Since the placebo effect was first described in science, in 1955 by Henry K. Beecher, little research has been done to uncover what positive values it could suggest. Most of all, the Placebo effect is considered a hidden defect to be taken into account when researching the effects of any given medication or new medical procedure.
In spite of the fact that the placebo effect became well known in what is orignally considered a decade with much facade and self-deceit, it did not win much acclaim. The next few decades were devoted to ritual undressings and explorations of the truths behind the lies, and the "finding yourself" and developing from all these uncovered things. In effect there has been little inclination to deal seriously with the self-delusion and it's possibilities.

 It took someone with a good deal of courage and not so much to lose, to take up this debate. And I am proud to present to you; the first preliminary results of the resumed research project of Placebo!

PLACEBO - effect  - What the eye doesn't see the heart doesn't grieve for. The Placebo effect is a useful effect of one persons deception of another. Although it is the other that deceives, the patient helps him/herself by the power of his or her own belief. This naturally puts us on course to investigate the possibilities of using these forces, when we are aware of what is going on. 

SELF-DELUSION - That a person singlehandledly deceives him/herself. I.e. by setting the alarm-clock half an hour earlier in order to get up out of bed in good time
In the long run however, you wont be able to fool yourself. 

TO LOOK PAST YOURSELF To attain a longlasting self-deceit, it is necessary to cultivate an actual doubt - a doubt that can last even after the tired temporary "beside-yourself" phase in the morning. What we need is a formula to keep a stable level of "beside youself." when you need it. Mny people have objected to, and made fun of the idea of objectivity on several occasions. Now it seems that we can find some use in the tools that objective journalists and theoreticians use. Tools for making sure they dont bring their personal issues into the matter. Many people have argued that it couldn't be done, so why try, but with the newest research on Placebo and self-deceit it just may be possible to obtain new and spectacular results!